Perfect Love
by TG-91
Summary: Ruby has embarked on a journey to find the perfect love, both for her, and for her talking, stubborn Caterpie Emerald. FINALLY UPDATED! Episode 4: Ruby and Emerald meets a fat trainer and his furious Ursaring! R&R!
1. Episode 1: With Eyes Deep As The Ocean

My name wouldn't be Ruby if I wasn't a pretty, cute girl with long, red hair and glowing, cerulean eyes...  
  
I could catch peoples attention wherever I went...  
  
Well, that tiny, defenseless little caterpillar Pokémon sure caught my attention that day.  
  
I had been walking for almost three hours, taking one of my usual evening promenades in the forest.  
  
Then I spotted, what would be my best friend, from that day on.  
  
A Caterpie. Its eyes glew like emeralds in the dawn, and even though it was a bug, it was sure the most overwhelming creature I had ever seen.  
  
Those large eyes. I just couldn't resist them.  
  
Gently I put the Caterpie in my arms, I just kneeled down in front of it.  
  
And it didn't even try to run away.  
  
I've always loved Pokémon, but I was a bit too lazy to get myself one.  
  
With Pokémon follows a great responsibility, and I am, honestly, not a person who can handle too much responsibility.  
  
I am a normal girl. Running after boys all day long, living for today, not for tomorrow.  
  
But even though I knew that I probably would threw the Caterpie out of the window someday because I had been tired of raising it like my own daughter , I brought it home.  
  
I didn't even need a Pokéball. Not that I had one, but anyway.  
  
Caterpie sat on my shoulder the whole way home to our little house in the middle of the forest.  
  
I played with it the whole night, and when I woke up on the afternoon, it was asleep on my belly.  
  
I once again got caught by those eyes.  
  
They were deep as the ocean, but beautiful as blooming flowers in the setting sun.  
  
I couldn't stop gazing into them. It was like felling into a bottomless pit. They were endless, like stars in the sky.  
  
And I even cried because of their beauty. And I'm not a girl that cries over nothing.  
  
I was raised with the nature as my second home.  
  
I wasn't even scared of Arboks or Ekans, even though they usually were a girls worst nightmare.  
  
But those eyes. Those beautiful, glowing eyes... I couldn't resist them.  
  
And I still can't.  
  
............................................................................ .........................................................  
  
Authors Note: Well, a pretty short story, but it sure was beautiful *wipes away a tear*.  
  
Should I continue? I just felt for writing a short story... So that I don't get writers block or some other horrible disease.  
  
Well, The Adventures Of Jason is my first priority, and I work day and night with it.  
  
But enjoy this short story, because I enjoyed the four minutes it took for me to write it...  
  
And don't forget to read The Adventures Of Jason *slap myself in the head with the back of my hand. "Shame on you, making promotion for your other fic..."*  
  
Well, should I continue? And if you wonder why I posted it under Romance/Humor... just in case I continue....If I do, I promise A LOT of humor...and a lot of romance...  
  
Ahh, I'll stop talking...please review anyway... 


	2. Episode 2: An Annoying Family

"Emerald!" I shouted in my Caterpies ear, and the caterpillar Pokémon slowly got up from its pillow.  
  
A rather ugly pillow. A rather... A VERY ugly pillow, that more looked like a messed up piece of the door carpet... But hey, Emerald likes it... She can't sleep without it...  
  
Emerald, my Caterpie, is just like me. Tired in the morning, lazy, and totally crazy in Caterpies of the opposite sex...  
  
The only difference is that I like male humans, not male Caterpies.  
  
My family (And extremely annoying members of it that I have almost deleted from my brain-storage) is a bit strange. A BIT strange.  
  
There is my mom. Over-protecting, annoying and totally freaked out. Every time she sees Emerald, she jumps up on the couch or she hides in the nearest closet.  
  
She can't stand bugs. Thats strange. Since she is a bug, that should be eliminated and burned... Mwahahaha...  
  
(This is getting more and more like a lousy budget-movie, don't you think? You can buy the movie-right if you want to... Give me a cheeseburger, and the whole story is yours...)  
  
And there is dad. Always reading the newspapers. Drinking his coffee. Putting his legs on the table.  
  
The same routine the last hundred years. He even uses exactly the same words. Day after day.  
  
But still, he isn't nearly as annoying as my little brother, Ken. Gee, he's probably the worst thing that walks on this planet.  
  
He is extremely annoying. And then I mean annoying. He is selfish, ego- centered, dumb, a freak, he's nuts, he doesn't know how to use the oven (not that I know...but anyway...) he can't even talk like a normal person, he acts like a two year old baby, and he's as slowminded as a dead Slowpoke (Should I continue? I could go on forever, but why bore you more than I already have...?)  
  
So that's why I have decided to run away from home. From school, from all the freaks that keep bugging me every day.  
  
"Oh, your so beautiful, Ruby"  
  
"Your hair shines like a Ruby, Ruby..."  
  
"I'm a perfect swimmer, but I drown in your eyes, baby..."  
  
"You know, Ruby... I heard on the news, the secret police is looking for a nice-looking young girl, sweet, kind, sexy and absolutely gorgeus. That means that all woman in the world are safe. Except for you Ruby... Were the heck are you going to hide? Maybe in my house? We could get married, you know.. Get lots of children..."  
  
"You know, Ruby... Your clothes would be even nicer in a pile beside mine..."  
  
Aw, god I hate those jerks! They think they could catch me... But I'm not easily flirted...  
  
And thats one of the reasons I'm leaving home.  
  
To find the perfect love.  
  
For me. And for Emerald. (Of course I'll find a Caterpie for her...but you already knew that... Or, are you one of those brain-dead maniacs that sneak into others bedrooms, reading their diarys?)  
  
If that means that I have to travel all over the world. Than so be it. I'l find him.  
  
Someday...  
  
And he better be handsome...  
  
Watch out, boys. Ruby is on the run!  
  
And for all the male Caterpies... You better hide behind the nearest bush. Emerald will wipe you down like a hurricane... (Or maybe she won't, but I have to say something for her too...)  
  
.................  
  
Well, not much to pack. My finest clothes. Some lipsticks (Probably enough to feed Emerald and me for a millenium, but hey, you don't eat lipsticks, and you can never pack too much....  
  
Well, I am a special case in that question...  
  
Emeralds pillow of course...  
  
And I admit. I made it from the carpet.  
  
Kens brain-dead Growlithe (I know, they are usually smart, but Kens presence must have killed all its brain-cells. Poor thing...) took a big bite of our door carpet.  
  
It threw everything up, and I made a pillow of it....  
  
Nah, I'm just joking... *Sigh* I suck at jokes, you know... But I laugh everyday anyway... Just a quick look at Ken is enough to keep me laughing for a year...  
  
I picked up Emerald. Put on my backpack, and opened my window. I used the rope I had created of some blankets, and I climbed my way down into the garden...  
  
Don't blame me for using a rope! I'm afraid of heights! And two meters is more than I can stand...  
  
Well, one last look at my house. One last look on Ken through his open window.  
  
I can see him trying to learn Growlithe to play piano.  
  
It would probably be easier to try to teach a Donphan to dance jitterbug.  
  
Kens Growlithe is probably the dumbest Pokémon I know... But hey, Pokémon adapts their trainers abilities...  
  
Thats why Emerald is so pretty...  
  
And thats why Growlithe is so dumb..  
  
...........  
  
Well, goodbye, annoying family. I will never return. Never.  
  
Now, my journey to find the perfect love begins.  
  
And I promise...  
  
This is ony the beginning!  
  
........  
  
Authors Note:  
  
Hey, did you like that? You see, I am pretty good at humor (Or at least I think). It was really hard, since Ruby is a girl. And I'm not a girl...  
  
I try as hard as I can, though.  
  
And this is a promising story...  
  
And its easy to write humor... It took fourteen minutes to write this episode...  
  
Bye, and review... 


	3. Episode 3: The Search Begins

Now, I'm going to tell you a secret.  
  
That only I, and Emerald of course, know about.  
  
She can talk.  
  
Emerald.  
  
We have kept it a secret for the rest of the family (For their own good...).  
  
I don't know where she got the ability from. There are very, very, very few Pokémon that can speak the human toungue.  
  
Well, Emerald is one of them.  
  
And we can talk about ANYTHING... Mostly we talk about boys. And Caterpie boys, of course.  
  
...........  
  
I sat down, and unpacked the sandwich that I've brought with me.  
  
I gave Emerald a third of it, and then we started to eat under silence.  
  
"You know, Ruby" Emerald said, looking me in the eyes. Aw, those eyes. "I just want to ask you a question... Is there a thing called Perfect Love? I thought no one was perfect. You have always said so to little Emerald..."  
  
"Clever as always, Emerald" I said and smiled, giving her another part of the sandwich. "Well, perfect love is the largest treasure of all, Emerald. You can't buy it, and that's why its so precious."  
  
"Well, have you any idea where we should start looking?" Emerald asked and gaved me a sharp look. "Maybe Emerald should help you to dig behind the nearest bush. With a little luck, we'll find a beautiful prince buried there..."  
  
"Aw, stop, Emerald." I said, slapping her on her little head. A bit too hard, since she fell down from the rock she was sitting on."You know that's not what I meant! There is no treasure map for this hunt, darling."  
  
I picked her up in my arms.  
  
"Come on. Let's leave the path for a while. Maybe we could find some handsome Caterpies for you..."  
  
Emerald nodded, and we walked out in the woods.  
  
"You don't want to do this for poor little Emerald, isn't it so?" Emerald said in my ear. She was sitting on my shoulder. "You only hope to find a handsome young wood-chopper with muscles as big as the trees he cuts down... Isn't it so?"  
  
"Of course not!" I said, honestly. My hopes were to find a handsome young TRAINER. Wood-choppers are always old geezers with amnesia. Remember that. Always...  
  
Suddenly, I spotted a dark-haired boy, lying between the trees, taking a nap.  
  
"Be quiet, Emerald." I whispered to my Caterpie. "Isn't he handsome?"  
  
"First you say "Be quiet" and then you ask me a question!" Emerald said, loudly. "So, do you want me to be quiet, or do you want me to answer your question? I get confused you know..."  
  
"Then...Hmm, be quiet."  
  
Caterpie said something that I couldn't hear. And I didn't care.  
  
I sneaked towards the boy, thinking of something clever to say. But my brain were currently on stand-by. My instincts had taken over.  
  
Grr...  
  
Suddenly, I stumbled over a root, and I fell over him, nearly crushing his ribs when I landed on him.  
  
He woke up with a scream, and he waved his arms like he had some kind of attack.  
  
He slapped me in the face, making me fall backwards, and then he got up on his feets like a rocket that just had been launched.  
  
"Dammit, you scared me!" he said, wiping the un-existing dust off his clothes. It was a symbolical act...  
  
"I'm so sorry..." I said with my softest voice as I put on the nicest smile I could muster.  
  
"Um...that's fine..." He said, blushing. "I just broke some ribs, but they can be fixed..."  
  
"What are you doing in the forest all alone?" I asked, sounding almost like my old grandmother. Geez, was I really that nervous?  
  
"I'm taking a nap. And I'm waiting for someone."  
  
No! My whole inside screamed in my head, and I let out a sigh, right in the face of the boy.  
  
"And I thought that you and I really had something undergoing!" I said, and I didn't hold back the anger.  
  
I could hear Emerald laugh quietly.  
  
"Ruby are an angry girl... Ruby are an angry girl..."  
  
"Oh dear god of heaven help me!" the boy shouted in my face, and pointed on Emerald. His hand was shaking. One of his attacks again. "A talking bug?!"  
  
I nodded, like there was nothing to it. The boys whole body was shaking, and he couldn't control himself.  
  
"I.......D-D-D-D-Don't li-li-li-like b-b-b-b-b-ugs!" he said. He was trembling, and his eyes were big as footballs, looking like they would pop out any second.  
  
"Don't tell me you are afraid of this little thing?" I asked, rasing my eyebrows.  
  
The boy nodded. He was lying on the ground, and still his body was shaking.  
  
"You should be afraid!" Emerald yelled, taking advantage of the situation. "I can make you tremble enough to start a minor earthquake! I'm the godess of darkness, the queen of shadows and the duchess of evil... I am the horrible and fearsome, and absolutely gourgeus.... Emerald! Yahoo!"  
  
The boy didn't answer. He had fainted. At least his attacks had stop.  
  
"Emerald!" I said, giving her a sharp look. "You destroyed my date!"  
  
"Sorry!" Emerald said, with a guilty undertone in her light voice. "Couldn't stay away..."  
  
"It's allright" I said and threw a stone in the boys head. He didn't wake up.  
  
"Is he dead?" Emerald asked, and her large eyes looked a bit worried.  
  
"I don't think so, Emerald" I replied. "You were too much for him... He just fainted. And it didn't really matter, anyway. He isn't the perfect love. He's a wimp. A jerk. Nothing for me, really...."  
  
"Glad to hear that, Ruby" Emerald said in my ear. "Lets get going before the one he's waiting for arrives. I can bet a million that it's a wood- chopper..."  
  
..................  
  
Our walk continued. I carefully wrote in my notebook.  
  
*Number 1:*  
  
*Name: Don't know. Didn't ask. Didn't want to know.  
  
*Look: Dark-haired. Beautiful eyes.  
  
*Favourite Dinner: Didn't ask. Didn't need to. Anything without bugs...  
  
*Favourite Movie: I don't know. At least I know that he isn't watching something with bugs...  
  
*Most Used Words: I'm afraid of bugs. (Nearly the only thing he said.)  
  
*Approved By Emerald: No. She scared him so much that he fainted. Probably, she didn't like him. But that's just a guess...  
  
*His problem: Afraid of bugs. VERY afraid of bugs. Especially talking bugs.  
  
*Relationship Duration: 0 years, 0 months, 0 hours, 0 minutes. It never existed. And it won't.  
  
*My Perfect Love: NO.  
  
I wrote NO with particulary large letters.  
  
"I want a book too!" Emerald shouted in my ear. "Please, please, please..."  
  
"But you can't write! And you can't even spell to I! And you sure can't hold a pencil with the sucker-cups you use as feets."  
  
"But Emerald wants a book!" Emerald said, with the softest voice she could. She tried to win my compassion. As she always did when she wanted something.  
  
"No, I said!"  
  
"If I don't get a book, I want pancakes and waffles for breakfast. And yummy, yummy strawberry-jam and extra sugar!"  
  
"Aw, you're driving me nuts, Emerald!" I said, letting out a sigh." You won't get a book. Pancakes and waffles....Okay... I make some..."  
  
"NO!" Emerald yelled in panic. "Not your waffles, poisonous. Baaad... Could get killed...I don't want to die!"  
  
"Aw, shut your little mouth!" I said, feeling my anger rising like a fire...  
  
"But Emerald wants cookies! You can't deny poor little Emerald some cookies!"  
  
"You won't get any cookies if you keep BUGging me!"  
  
"Okay...I'll be quiet as a...quiet Emerald..."  
  
"Then you won't be so quiet, won't you?" I said, getting more and more frustrated. "We have to get back to the path. In the city, there is plenty of handsome guys..."  
  
"But what about Emerald?!" Emerald yelled in my ear.  
  
"That's it!" I said. "You won't get a book, you won't get any pancakes or waffles or cookies!"  
  
"No cookies?"  
  
"No cookies! Do I have to brain-wash you before you understand?"  
  
"Emerald understand..." Emerald said with a sad voice.  
  
"Aw!" I said and stopped. I took off my backpacks and grabbed the cookies. "Here! Eat until you get as fat as Ken! I warned you, Emerald..."  
  
Emerald shook her head, and started to feast on the cookies.  
  
I let out a sigh.  
  
She sure was a stubborn Caterpie...  
  
............ Authors Note:  
  
Well, how do you like it? I think its pretty good, even though I'm only using the ideas that didn't fit in The Adventures Of Jason...  
  
Well, anyway, stay tuned as Ruby and Emerald continues their search for the perfect love... 


	4. Episode 4: Completely Lost

A/N: Well, I finally continued this one! This chapter is pretty bad, but it was enough to make me get my inspiration back for TAOJ. Anyway, enjoy, and happy new year!  
  
-------  
  
Chapter Four: Completely Lost  
  
-------  
  
He was so handsome. There's no words to describe his enormous beauty. I wanted him... I reached out for him, I longed to embrace him in my arms, feel his lips against mine.  
  
But then it hit me.  
  
Maybe because Emerald whacked me in the head with a stick, and abruptly disturbed my good sleep.  
  
"I'm not...a morning...person" I whined, rubbing my forehead as I tried to crawl out of my sleeping bag.  
  
"Emerald wants breakfast! Breakfast! Pancakes! Waffles! Come on!" she screeched, and I sighed and pulled my pillow over the head.  
  
"Let me sleep, Emerald!" I said and tried to go back to sleep as quick as possible, to catch the vision of him again.  
  
"WAKE UP!"  
  
Another punch with the stick. Now right in my stomach and I screamed in pain.  
  
Can't believe she can swing so hard. She's like a couple of inches high, and she doesn't even have hands.  
  
"WAFFLES, RUBY! We must find a waffle house!" Emerald yelled.  
  
"We have some in the backpack.." I mumbled. "You can..."  
  
"In your dreams, sweetheart!" Emerald said, putting on her deepest basetone. "Your waffles could kill an elephant! Emerald not touching rotten waffles!"  
  
"I guess I have to get up then." I sighed and got out from my warm, cosy sleeping bag. "I don't know where we'll find a waffle house though."  
  
....................  
  
"According to this piece of paper..."  
  
"It's called a map" I said, sarcastically. Aww, I love to tease her.  
  
"Well, map... The mappie says that we're almost there!" She said, with an obvious tone of self-esteem in her high-pitched voice.  
  
"You've been saying that for the past two hours." I muttered, and kicked a stone into the grass.  
  
"We just need to..." Emerald paused and glanced on the map. "Go one mile south, three miles east past a blue line and then it's straight up!"  
  
"Brilliant." I said and took the map from my caterpillar-Pokémon. "You've been holding it upside down."  
  
"Oh... Is that why the letter in front of North suddenly changed to S?"  
  
I whacked her head with the map.  
  
"Great, Emerald. A couple of minutes ago, we were lost. Now, we're completely lost. From now on, I'll read the map."  
  
"You can't do it as good as Emerald!" Emerald teased in my ear. "Ruby is a stupid girl. Ruby will make herself and poor Emerald end up on the bottom of the ocean, or inside a giant, human-eating tree. Stupid girl."  
  
"Emerald... Can't you be quiet?"  
  
"Yes, Emerald can. But Emerald doesn't want to. HA!"  
  
I sighed again. She was already about to go on my nerves.  
  
.................  
  
"Emerald, it can't be tiring sitting on my shoulder!" I sighed and sat down in the grass, as we took our fifth pause in thirty minutes.  
  
"It is. Really." Emerald ensured and stretched out her little body in the grass.  
  
"Well, maybe because it takes such a huge amount of energy just keeping your brain from falling apart" I muttered.  
  
We didn't say anything more, instead, we took a nice, pleasant nap. And I dreamed a nice, pleasant dream.  
  
...............  
  
After our nap, we continued to walk around aimlessly inside the forest, which never seemed to end.  
  
I had already threwn away the map, since we were lost already. It probably didn't even show the right part of the world.  
  
"Hold it right there!" Someone suddenly said from behind. "Are you a trainer?"  
  
I turned around, as I quickly held a finger in front of Emerald's mouth. A man, looking like an overweight pig stood in front us. He was probably twice my width, and at least a head higher than myself. His fingers were thick like hot dogs, and they firmly held a Pokéball.  
  
"I bet my Machamp can kick that Caterpie of yours back to the stone age"  
  
Emerald tried to say something, but I quickly slapped her over her mouth.  
  
"What are you doing?" The fat man asked, as his grip around the Pokéball tightened. "Come on, let's fight! I WANT TO FIGHT!"  
  
"Um... We can't!" I said.  
  
Emerald in a fight? That's more unlikely than having me do 300 pushups because I think it's fun.  
  
"And why is that?" The man asked and took a step closer. "You know the rules, girl. If two trainers have eye-contact, it automatically means that you have to fight."  
  
"We didn't have eye-contact!" I gasped.  
  
"We do know, pretty."  
  
"We can't fight!" I repeated. "You know, my Pokémon...She's..."  
  
"She's what?"  
  
"Um. Sick!" I spat out, since that was the answer that seemed the most... um... logical. "Yes, she has schizofrenia! She's totally lost. A psycho, according to the doctor."  
  
"She sure doesn't look like a psycho." The man took another step towards me, and I was getting worried.  
  
"Well... She is!" I assured, still holding a hand in Emerald's face to prevent her from saying anything. "Um, she's going to the doctor to get executed... uh, I mean examined."  
  
"Is that true?" The fat man asked, frowning his forehead.  
  
"Talk, Emerald, talk" I whispered in her ear.  
  
"You, fat guy over there!" She yelled, and I quickly put my hand over her face.  
  
"See?!" I said, smiling anxiously. "She thinks that she's a human!  
  
"That's bad... Really bad...Doctor, you say? Then what are you doing in the middle of the forest, when the city is in that direction?" He asked sharply and used his enormous hand to point to the right. "You are afraid to lose your money, aren't you, pretty?"  
  
"Well... You see... I...." I ended the sentence.  
  
So typically me, to solve the situation with violence. Quickly, I clenched my fist, took a step forward and punched him in the face as hard as I could.  
  
He probably broke his nosebone, because a large crack was heard before he fell backwards and hit the ground, so hard that the ground shook beneath me.  
  
"RUBY!" Emerald gasped between my fingers. "What are you doing, mean girl?!"  
  
"Dammit!" I swore, and watched the fat man I just knocked. "It was a reflex."  
  
"The fatty guy is going to be real mad at poor Ruby when he wakes up" Emerald stated, staring at the man who laid flat in the grass. "Ruby broke his nosebone! Violent girl! Faaaar too violent. Someday, you'll get yourself and poor, poor, innocent Emerald into prison."  
  
"Ouch..." The man whined, and I practically jumped out of my shoes.  
  
"He's waking up!" Emerald screamed. "Ruby, punch him again! Quick, use your kung-fu!"  
  
I hesited, long enough to see him roll up on his feets.  
  
"YOU!" He said, with salive dripping from his mouth as he picked up the Pokéball. "You punched me! Ursaring, attack them! Eat them alive!"  
  
"Me think we should run" Emerald suggested quietly in my ear as a gigantic Ursaring materialized in front of us.  
  
"Good plan" I said.. And then I, and my little caterpillar-Pokémon turned around and dashed into the woods.  
  
And the giant Ursaring, and its furious, fat little trainer, ran after us.  
  
.......................................  
  
"RUN, Ruby! RUN!" Emerald shouted panically in my ear. "RUN! You're not running fast enough!"  
  
"I'M NOT A RAPIDASH!" I yelled back, running for my life between the trees.  
  
"YOU SHOULD BE ABLE TO DO A RAPID DASH ANYWAY!" Emerald screamed. "Faster, Ruby! That Ursaring is going to eat poor Emerald alive!"  
  
The Ursaring ran after us, every step it took made the ground tremble. It didn't even turn for the trees, it just ran them down like a giant bulldozer.  
  
"IS HIS URSARING GOING ON STEROIDS, OR WHAT?!" I yelled. "URSARINGS ARE NOT SUPPOSED TO RUN THAT FAST!"  
  
"THAT ONE DOES, RUBY!" Emerald screeched. "I DON'T WANT TO DIE!"  
  
"YOU WILL NOT, EITHER! HE'S GOING TO GET TIRED SHORTLY!"  
  
Me and my lies. The truth was, that I was so tired that my legs practically moved themself. If it hadn't been for that gigantic Ursaring, I would have been lying flat on the ground catching my breath.  
  
But since Emerald doesn't have legs, I have to do the dirty work. I really wish I had been more enthusiastic on the gymnastic-lessons.  
  
"RUBY! WATCH OUT FOR THE TREE!" Emerald yelled, but to late.  
  
Suddenly, I hit something hard, felt my face practically getting mashed against the tree.  
  
Things started to spin before my eyes, and I stumbled backwards, feeling my conscious flying away from me.  
  
A dark shimmer lowered in front of my eyes, and I fell backwards and hit the ground.  
  
The last thing I heard before I passed out, was Emeralds frantic voice.  
  
"Ruby! WAKE UP! He's going to eat Emerald! Emerald is going to die!"  
  
------------------- 


End file.
